These characteristics are offered as a tool to aid in self-evaluation. They can be particularly helpful to residents who are exploring themselves, taking self-inventory, post-marathon processing, or Re-Entry Class assignment. As they begin to understand how codependency issues affect their life, they can begin to take steps in making healthier decisions.

Typical characteristics of a co-dependent:

I assume responsibility for others' feelings and/or behaviors.

I feel overly responsible for others' feelings and/or behaviors.

I have difficulty in identifying feelings -- am I angry? lonely? sad? happy? joyful?

I have difficulty expressing feelings -- I am feeling ... happy, sad, hurt, joyful

I tend to fear and/or worry how others may respond to my feelings.

I have difficulty in forming and/or maintaining close relationships.

I am afraid of being hurt and/or rejected by others.

I am perfectionistic and place too many expectations on myself and others.

I have difficulty making decisions.

I tend to minimize, alter or even deny the truth about how I feel.

Other people's actions and attitudes tend to determine how I respond/react.

I tend to put other people's wants and needs first.

My fear of others' feelings (anger) determines what I may say and do.

I question or ignore my own values to be the same as my significant others. I value others' opinions more than my own.

My self-esteem is bolstered by outside/other influences. I cannot accept or acknowledge good things about myself.

My serenity and mental attention is determined by how others are feeling and/or behaving.

I tend to judge everything I do think or say harshly, by someone else's standards ' nothing is done, said or thought "good enough."'

I do not believe that being vulnerable and asking for help is both okay and normal .

I do not believe that it is okay to talk about problems outside the family; or that feelings just as -- and it is better to share than than to deny, minimize or justify them.

I tend to put other people's wants and needs before my own. I see myself as steadfastly loyal -- even when the loyalty is unjustified and personally harmful .

I have to be "needed" in order to have a relationship with others.